What to Know Before Watching PSU Wrestling Satire | Lifestyle

Penn State is widely known for its dominance in college wrestling.

For students who want to start watching wrestling, it can be confusing to know what’s going on.

You’re in luck, because I’m here to help you. Well known as a wrestling expert, there is nothing I don’t know about the sport.

Here’s everything you need to know before attending BJC’s matchup against the Wyoming Cowboys this Sunday and in the future.

Whoever cuddles best wins

Wrestling is actually a very healthy sport, dedicated to improving cuddling skills.

You may have seen matches before and thought, “Wow, that’s a really aggressive hug.” »

Dear reader, you are well on your way to becoming an expert. The wrestler who manages to hug the best is the winner.

The headgear is used to keep the ears warm

The cauliflower ear is actually a myth, invented to make headgear more durable.

It gets pretty cold for the wrestlers once they take off their tracksuits, so they wear earmuffs to stay warm on the mat.

Apparently, you might even see the wrestling team wearing their earmuffs – I mean, their headgear – on the way to class or practice in the winter.

It takes 45 minutes to put on a swimsuit

You can imagine that wrestling would be a dangerous sport if the singlets weren’t secure.

However, this creates another problem: the jerseys are incredibly difficult to put on.

Most wrestlers spend about 45 minutes putting on their singlets, but the training required helps them gain weight, so everything goes smoothly.

The flames before the BJC duels are there to warm up the wrestlers

You may have thought the flames at the Bryce Jordan Center were just to look cool, but they serve another purpose.

Not only do wrestlers wear earmuffs, but they also warm up by standing near the flames when their teammates burn out.

Life is cold when you don’t have body fat.

The best wrestlers choose their opponent in the stands

Have you ever seen a Penn State wrestler dominate an opponent who didn’t seem to have a clue what was going on?

Well, the truth is, they probably didn’t.

The wrestler with the most wins gets to choose their opponent from the stands once they have proven they beat the rest of the competition.

The view from the front row is great, but make sure you’re warmed up in case you’re the fan selected to throw yourself on the carpet.

The mat is made of memory foam

Our goal is to reduce injuries, and memory foam is the way to go.

If you’ve ever cringed watching a wrestler get slammed to the mat, fear not, because it’s as fluffy as a cloud.

Sometimes wrestlers simply sleep on the mats instead of going home after practices and duels.

Winning wrestlers eat first

You may have heard about wrestlers’ efforts to make weight, but you probably haven’t heard about wrestlers’ efforts to eat after every match.

Not only does the loser go home with a mark on their record, but they also have to wait for the winner to eat first.

I’d call it salt in the wound, but they also have to wait for seasoning.

MORE LIFESTYLE CONTENT